I find that I am having lots of ripe bananas around the house these days…well, not actually around the house, more like on the kitchen counter in the designated banana spot.  Do you have a designated banana spot?  My designated banana spot is on the counter right next to the stove in front of the radio.  If they were anywhere else I think I’d forget we had them.  Anyway, so I have these ripe bananas for the small child in my life and since his little stomach is the size of a kiwi, he isn’t yet able to put them all away before they go bad, so what’s a new mom to do?  Bake them with chocolate and bourbon.  Naturally.

Here’s how we start this masterpiece, as I like to call it.

WARNING WARNING WARNING.

Don’t buy these vegan carob chips, I don’t know why I had them.  Not good. (not even a little) And don’t worry…I didn’t end up using them anyway.  Ugh.

Add that flour to the sifter.  I know it’s not fun.  And we’ve discussed this before.

Add some…

baking…

powder.

Ok.  I know I was all braggy braggy about my new measuring spoons before and how accurate they are.  But old habits die hard for this girl.  I really just like to use my teaspoon and tablespoon measuring spoons for all my “little” measuring.  I mean, I know good and well that’s a 1 teaspoon measuring spoon, but that looks like it’s about a 1/2 teaspoon of salt, right?  Right?!

Maybe if you look a little closer.

That’s TOTALLY a 1/2 teaspoon.  Right?!

Ok, sift.

Make sure that butter is soft before you add it to the mixer.

Splat.

Splatted.  Real word.

Add the sugar.  SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR.

When I eat sugar, it makes me feel like my life is in ALL CAPS.

Whip

it.

Scrape the sides so it all gets some whipped action.

Fluffy is the goal.  The goal in baking, but not in life.

Eggs!!

And ya mix ‘em, ya mix ‘em, ya mix ‘em mix ‘em mix ‘em.

And ya stir ‘em, ya stir ‘em, ya stir ‘em stir ‘em stir ‘em.

Plop.

Whipped.

Aaaaaaaaand…

Smooooooooosh. Smoosh. Smoosh. Smoosh.

Whoooooooa.

Sloorp.  Real word.

Le-le-le-lemon. Drip. Drip. Drop.

Dramatic lemon juice.

Dribble, dribble, dribble.

Sigh.

Ugh.

Sprinkle sprinkle sprinkle.

Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy

Shake, shake, shake.

Shapin’ up!

These are the actual real live chocolate chips I used.  I only had a 1/2 cup left, so I just used them instead of the dreadful carob ones.

Dump.

Fold.

Pooooooooour. Blop. Poooooooooour. Blop.

Sniff. Sniff.

Inhale.

 Chocolate Bourbon-Spiked Banana Bread

Adapted from Joy the Baker Cookbook

makes one 8 x 4 inch or 9 x 5 inch loaf

2 cups all-purpose flour

3 teaspoons baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 cup unsalted butter, softened

1 cup granulated sugar

2 large eggs

1 1/2 cups mashed ripe bananas (about 3)

1 teaspoon lemon juice

3 tablespoons bourbon

1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips (but 1 cup would be better)

Place a rack in the center of the oven and preheat to 350 degrees F.  Grease the loaf pan and set aside.

In a medium bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, and salt.

In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment, beat butter and sugar until light and fluffy.  Add eggs one at a time, beating for 1 minute between each addition.  Stop the mixer to scrape down the sides of the bowl.  Add bananas, lemon juice, and bourbon and beat until well incorporated.

Turn the mixer on low and add the flour mixture all at once.  Beat until almost incorporated.  Stop the mixer and remove the bowl.  Add the chocolate chips and fold into the batter.  Spoon the mixture into a loaf pan.  Bake for 45 minutes to 1 hour, or until a toothpick inserted in the center of the load comes out clean.  Remove from the oven and allow the loaf to cool in the pan for 20 minutes before inverting onto a wire rack to cool completely.  Eat it.

I made donuts because I decided that I wanted a donut.  I’m not saying it was a healthy decision.  In fact, the word donut is derived from an Ancient Greek term that we are all familiar with “do not”.  (Not really,  I just made that up) But the Good Lord gave us fried dough for a reason.  Because it is good.  Really good.  ” On the 8th day, after all that resting, God made donuts.”   I’ll stop now.

There are a few different parts to this project.  If this is your first time making a donut, I’d suggest this cake donut recipe.  A yeasted dough takes a little extra time/ steps.

First, gather the ingredients for the dough:

The original recipe calls for cake or soft wheat flour of which I have none, so I just used what I always have on hand: all-purpose.  But you can substitute 2 Tablespoons of cornstarch per cup of all purpose flour to make your own cake flour.  I did not do that and had no complaints.

Sift all your dry ingredients together (except the sugar because that comes later).  It’s annoying, but it helps in the long run I’ve learned.  So, sift… it’s worth it.  Wink.

Add that salt.

Add that baking powder.And then we have the nutmeg.  You CAN’T SKIP this ingredient if you don’t have it.  You don’t necessarily need a whole nutmeg, but it’s lovely if you have one.

I got this nutmeg from “the spice island” of Grenada when we were on a cruise last Fall.  I didn’t realize it was a nut that needed to be cracked open until I opened the package and heard the nut bouncing around inside the shell.  

When you grate it, it reveals all the little lovely swiggles. <Technical Term>

Extreme close up.  I think this little nutmeg was my favorite part of the donut making experience.  Well, until you get to the stuffing your face with a fresh donut part.

Ok, back to business.  Grate your nutmeg.  I used a microplane which worked great.  Hehe.

Then add your 3/4 teaspoon of grated nutmeg.  Confession!  I was just using my 1 teaspoon and 1 tablespoon measuring spoons for all my baking because I could never find my other ones.  So if a recipe called for 1/2 teaspoon I would totally just eyeball a 1/2 teaspoon in my 1 teaspoon measuring spoon. Frowny face.  So my mother-in-law got me these real measuring spoons!

Math:  1/2 teaspoon + 1/4 teaspoon = 3/4 teaspoon.  Right?

And sift…

And then look at the cute baby!

Moving on.  Next is time to incorporate your sugar with your fat.  Yep,  We’re making donuts, it was bound to happen.

Sugar.

Fat.

Add fat to sugar.

Don’t lick the spoon.

Mix mix mix until it’s a sandy consistency.

1 egg + 1 egg yoke + leftover nutmeg

Add this to your sugar and fat.

Egg action shot.  Whoaaaaa….Splat.

Mix until it looks like this, scraping the sides of the bowl of course.

Next we add the dry ingredients alternating with the milk…after we measure out the milk.

I find it’s easier to just use a small measuring cup to dump in the dry ingredients rather than using the whole bowl to dump everything in.

You add the dry and wet ingredients in 3 separate additions and mix on low speed.  It’s really really really really sticky dough.  So don’t think you messed up.  It’s supposed to be really really really really really really sticky.

Sticky dough.

Really sticky dough.

Add it to a separate bowl.

And cover it with plastic wrap.

And stick it in the fridge for at least an hour and up to a day.

Moving onto the glaze.  Gather and stack your ingredients.

Sift powdered sugar into the mixer. (Annoying, but necessary)

Sifting…

Measure your golden syrup or corn syrup.

And pour it into your powdered sugar.

Next add your salt and vanilla.

Then you make a little syrup.

You add water and…

…sugar…

…to a pot and boil…

Add this to your sugar mixer in the mixing bowl.

Then run to the store because you realize you don’t have nearly enough oil for frying.  I bought the biggest thang of Canola oil I could find.

Glug, glug, glug, add in almost all of it into a heavy bottomed pan.  You need at least 2 inches of oil and  enough room up top to flip your dough.

Stick a candy thermometer in there and set your heat to medium.  You don’t want it to heat too quickly because then it may get too hot.

This takes a little while.  So while you are waiting for your oil to come up to temperature, get started on rolling out & cutting out your donuts.

Pull out the dough from your container and place it on your clean, floured surface.  This may take some time and patience since it is still really really really really really really sticky dough.

Roll it out with plenty of flour on your surface and on the rolling pin to about a 1/2 inch thick or 8 inches in diameter.  (PS: I broke out the measuring tape on this one)

And word of warning.  Since it’s also a really soft dough, it doesn’t take much elbow grease to manipulate this dough.  I starting goin’ to town on it like it was a pie dough or pizza dough.  And realized I was rolling it too thin.  Just be easy with it, it doesn’t take much force.

Next, choose your donut cutting device.  I don’t have a donut cutter, so I just used this glass from Ikea.  Make sure you flour it really well so it doesn’t stick to the dough too much.

And start cutting…

Let’s see, I got 1 – 2 -3 -4 -5 -6 – 7 rounds from that first roll.

Then you just gather it all up…

…and roll it out again.

And repeat your cutting.

Cut, cut, cut. 8 – 9 – 10

Hmm.  Do you think we can get 2 more out of that dough?

Cut.  11

Hand shape #12, and there is our dozen.

They look more like biscuits at this point.  We need to find something to create holes.

And poke, poke, poke.  Makin’ holes.

There they are…all ready for a fry.

Be super careful on this step.  Deep frying is dangerous.  (in more than 1 way) That oil is a warm 370 degrees.

When you first put them in the oil, they sink all the way to the bottom, then they float up to the top and start to puff up and brown.

Each side gets a 60 second turn in the oil.  Then you carefully lift them our with a spider if you have one, or the big end of a wooden (NOT plastic) chop stick.

Here’s the first 1/2 dozen all fried up and cooling on the paper towels.  It totally smells like the fair.

You can’t multitask during this frying step.  Your full attention needs to be on these donuts.  Not hard to do.

And those little donut holes get the treatment too.

Hurry and glaze them while they are still hot and glaze is still warm.  I had to heat my glaze up a tiny bit because it had been sitting out for a while.

All glazed and delicious.  You don’t have to glaze them though.  They are still really good on their own.

Here ya go.  Oh man!!

Share them!  Ok?  Or not.

Spice Cake Doughnuts

makes 1 dozen doughnuts

adapted from Top Pot Doughnuts

2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 tsp baking powder

1 tsp salt

3/4 tsp fresh ground nutmeg

2/3 cup sugar

2 T shortening

1 large egg + 1 large egg yolk

2/3 cup almond milk

canola oil for frying

Sift flour, baking powder, salt and nutmeg together into a medium bowl and set aside.

In a stand mixer with paddle attachment, mix the sugar and shortening for 1 minute on low speed until it comes to a sandy texture.  Then add the egg and egg yolk and mix for another minute on medium speed until light colored and thick.  Make sure to scrape the side of the bowl.

Add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients in three separate additions alternating with the milk.  Mix until just combines on low speed each time.  The dough will be sticky and wet.

Transfer dough to a clean bowl and cover dough directly with plastic wrap.  Refrigerate for an hour or up to 24 hours.

Heat canola oil in deep fryer or a large heavy bottomed pot over medium heat.  Heat oil to 370 degrees using candy thermometer.

Roll out the chilled dough onto your floured work surface to 1/2 inch thick or 8 inches in diameter.  Flour the rolling pin and top of dough as needed to prevent sticking. Cut out doughnuts and hole, folding and re-rolling as needed.

Shake off excess flour from the doughnuts and holes prior to frying.  Place doughnuts in oil a few at a time taking care not crowding the pan.  Once the doughnut floats, fry for 60 seconds per side or until deep golden brown.  Drain on paper towels.

Glaze or ice doughnuts and holes if desired.

Top Pot’s Vanilla Doughnut Glaze

Small Batch coats 12 doughnuts and their holes

adapted from Top Pot Doughnuts

2 cups confectioners’ sugar, sifted

1 1/2 tsp light corn or golden syrup

1/4 tsp salt

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

1 T granulated sugar

1/2 cup plus 1 T water

Place sifted confectioners’ sugar, golden syrup, salt, and vanilla in the work bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment.  Set aside.

Next, make a syrup with the granulated sugar and water.  Whisk the granulated sugar and water together in a small saucepan.  Bring to a boil over high heat, then reduce the heat to medium and simmer for 1 minute, stirring occasionally.  Add the syrup to the confectioners’ sugar bowl.  Using low speed on the mixer, blend until the mixture is smooth and all of the sugar has been incorporated, scraping the sides of the bowl with a rubber spatula if necessary.

To glaze, immediately dip one side of each hot doughnut into the warm glaze, and let dry for 10 to 15 minutes before serving.

Make cupcakes, of course…

… and try too hard to pipe on the frosting with her new piping bag/ tips.

But it worked, I only thought about Baby 13 times while preparing these delightful cups of cake.  And that was just because the key limes were really cute and little.  Or maybe it was the eggs…sorry that took it too far, didn’t it?  I’ll give you a high five if you can spy my tribute to St. Patrick’s Day in this picture.

My favorite part of baking…

And you should all know what comes after this.

And then add air and MAGIC.

I love this!!  Fluffy butter and sugar.  I could just stop here.  But I took a bunch of other pictures, so here they are.

There’s those eggs.

There they are again, add one at a time.

And the work begins.  I got a little ahead of myself and decided to start juicing right away because remember that I am only using 12.3% of my brain.  You’ve got to zest those teeny key limes too and it’s much easier to do that when they are whole and intact.

Drip, drip, drip.  Squirrrrrrt.

I’d like to take a moment to dedicate this recipe to my citrus juicer.  My citrus juicer is my favorite kitchen appliance.  My mixer is pretty rad, but this little guy is all muscle.

Add that juicy key lime juice and the zest.

Then comes the flours.  Flour to me is kinda like mom jeans.  It’s necessary and practical since we are baking cups of cake and all but it’s just not flashy. Now, butter and sugar, on the other hand, are like the trendy designer skinny jeans on a super model.  Although super models probably have never heard of butter and sugar. And when the recipe calls for buttermilk, use buttermilk.  I learned this is key.  Especially if you are baking for special people (other than yourself), buttermilk makes it taste like you are a talented baker.

Alternate the flour and buttermilk: flour, buttermilk, flour, buttermilk, flour.  Scrape the sides when it’s looking like it needs it.  You’ll have a nice thick batter when you are all done.

See?  And I opted against using the cupcake liners since I was using a fancy cupcake tin.  And I think I filled them a bit too much.  But I didn’t want to use 2 trays and the recipe says it makes a dozen.  So, by golly, I made a dozen cupcakes.  A dozen large cupcakes.

Lucy helped her furry self to one.

Frosting time!!  Sift your powdered sugar into your butter and your cream cheese and your lime zest and your vanilla.  I use exclamation points because I can eat this out of the bowl since there’s no raw ingredients.  Not that I do that, it’s just an option that I have.

There they all are. Exclamation point.

No words.

Green gel food coloring leapt onto the frosting.  Let’s see what happened.

 Instant party.  But the trick is making it lime green, not mint green.  See the dilemma?

I see the perfection in the imperfect.  In other words, I see cupcakes.

Cupcakes and limes.  All around a good idea.

Babies.

Key Lime Cupcakes

Makes 12 cupcakes.

adapted from Bon Appetit

Cupcakes

1 cup all purpose flour

3/4 cup self-rising flour

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature

2 large eggs

2 1/2 tablespoons fresh lime juice

1 tablespoon finely grated lime peel

3/4 cup buttermilk

Frosting

1 8-ounce package cream cheese, room temperature

1 1/2 cups powdered sugar

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature

1 tablespoon finely grated lime peel

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Green food coloring

Preparation

Cupcakes

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.  Line muffin pan with 12 paper liners (or not).  Whisk both flours in medium bowl.  Beat butter in large bowl until smooth.  Add sugar; beat to blend.  Beat in eggs 1 at a time, then the lime juice and peel (batter may look curdled).  Beat in flour mixture in 3 additions alternately with buttermilk in 2 additions.  Spoon scant 1/3 cup batter into each liner.

Bake cupcakes until tester inserted into center comes out clean, 20 to 25 minutes.  Cool 10 minutes. Remove from pan; cool.

Frosting

Beating all ingredients in medium bowl until smooth.  Spread over cupcakes.

Babies.

Stop it. I know!  I’ve been on….leave? Or let’s call it pre-leave.

Well, you try growing a baby in your belly while being repulsed by every smell (every single smell) you encounter and bake and act like you like it.  Try it.  Dare you.  PS. dont’ mess with me, I have hormones.

Here, I made this.  So….

And its’ Gooooouuuuud.  It’s brought to you by Christmas and Ms. Martha Stewart.  And the letter B.

Christmas because I got a butt/boat load of baking supplies and a smantzy camera for Christmas and Ms. Stewart because she thought up this swirly bob.  And I’ll get to ‘B’, just hold on a minute.

And they are Serious about the Ultimate-ness of this cake.  Watch.

Lots of everything.  Including 2 kinds glorious sugar.

All of this butterness.

I could seriously just eat one of those slices straight up.  Pregnancy is weird.

Hello pre-prepared pecan pieces out of the package!  Thank you for your existence.  Thank you.

The more you cut them up, the easier it is to smoosh them into the dry ingredients.  And it’s not like a pie crust, so don’t worry about keeping the butter super cold.  The recipe called for “softened” butter, but I wouldn’t go that far.

Work it out.

Till it’s streuselly.

Mix it up and now you have the biggest bowl of streusel your have ever made.   And you will use it all!

Now time for the cake part.

Sift the dry like you do.

And then play with the functions on your new camera and get an action shot.

Sugar and butter getting together.

Lovely.

Add the eggs one at at time and let them incorporate.  You know this.  Remember the vanilla.

And this is not an ad for Kitchen Aid.  I just need to learn how to focus my camera.

How do you say ‘eggs’?  Do you say it the right way? Ehggs.  Or the terribly wrong way? Aaeggs.  What about the word ‘measure’?  Mehsure or Maysure?

There will be a quiz later.

This is a good situation.  Nothing can go wrong with a bright blue full fat sour cream container nearby.

Start and end with the flour, but alternate the flour with the sour cream.

And if you watch Ms. Stewart’s video (which is on the left column of the recipe’s webpage).  Whatever you do, don’t over mix the batter.  If you do, I think she’ll come over to your house and crack some eggs in your face right after she lectures you and your cat on the science of gluten.

Add 1/2 of the batter to your new Christmas swirly bundt pan.

And just know that all that streusel will ultimately end up in and on your cake.  (see what I did there?)

 So far you have: batter and streusel.  Half way done.

Then add the rest of the batter.  It’s a good batter.  Really dense.  Or maybe I just over mixed it.

 Uh-oh.

Then top with the remaining streusel.

The other living creatures in my house (1 human, 1 canine) emerge from wherever they were at this point and enter the vicinity of where this is happening.

 See the streusel layer in the middle?

This is a good thing.

This is where I got a bit creative and added my own twist on the icing.  Think confectioners sugar, browned butter, vanilla, milk.  Mmm-hmm.

Many thanks to my handsome drizzling assistant.  Excellent job!

Fully iced.

Fully delicious.

Oh and for the ‘B’.  It’s a boy!

Ultimate Streusel Cake

From Martha Stewart with an adapted Icing

For The Pecan-Streusel Filling

1 1/2 cups packed light-brown sugar

1 tablespoon ground cinnamon

Pinch of ground cloves

1/2 cup granulated sugar

1/2 cup all-purpose flour

1/4 teaspoon coarse salt

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened

1 1/2 cups coarsely chopped pecans

For The Cake

Nonstick cooking spray with flour

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon coarse salt

10 tablespoons (1 1/4 sticks) unsalted butter, room temperature

1 cup granulated sugar

3 large eggs

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1 1/4 cups sour cream

For The Icing

2 1/2 cups sifted confectioners’ sugar

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

4 tablespoons of browned butter

 Enough almond milk for desired thickness

Directions

Make the filling: Combine brown sugar, cinnamon, and cloves in a medium bowl. Stir in

granulated sugar, flour, and salt. Using your hands or a pastry cutter, cut in butter until

combined and mixture is crumbly; stir in nuts. Transfer to the refrigerator until ready to use.

You can’t, can you?  It’s like trying to frown when you skip down the hall.  Or trying to be mad while you whistle.  It’s impossible.  It’s Ok though.  It’s the universe.  Nothing rhymes with orange and you can’t say anything bad about chocolate.

A fly just flew into my computer screen, nice try buddy.  I don’t blame you though.  I too am having sudden urges to jump in there and swim around.

Do you remember these chocolate wafers?  They look super familiar to me too, but I can’t quite remember what goodness they were transformed into as a small child.  Butter!  Chocolate Chips!

Oh, man.

Uh-huh.

That is the cookies in the food processor into which the melted butter and chocolate chips drizzles in (and around) the opening.

Dump that chocolately chocolate crunchy crunch into a pie dish.

And smoosh it.

For the creamy pie part, gather the goods.

Mix the sugar, corn starch, cocoa powder, salt in your cookin’ pot.

Separate your eggs 1 -2- 3- 4- 5- 6, but save your whites.  David Lebovitz has a great post here telling you what to do with all of them.

Mix your pyramid of yolks with the dry ingredients.

It’s super thick.  That’s good.

Low fat milk!?! No!  NOOO!  I just straight up used Whole Milk.  Worth it.

Mix it up, whisk, whisk.  Go get your muscles and mix it more until it’s thick like this.

And they meet.

And they are meeting.

And they’ve met.  Try to say something mean just looking at this.  Ok, now stop trying, don’t waste your time.

Whip up your cream, sugar, vanilla and if you don’t have a pastry bag like me, just stick it in a gallon plastic ziptop bag, cut the corner off and dollop away.  Dollop.  Dollop.  Dollop.  Dollop dollop dollop. Dollop.

Black- Bottom Chocolate Pie

adapted from epicurious

Crust

Nonstick vegetable oil spray

6 tablespoons (3/4 stick) unsalted butter

1 ounce semisweet chocolate chips

30 chocolate wafer cookies

Filling

2/3 cup sugar

1/4 cup cornstarch

2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

Pinch of salt

6 large egg yolks

2 cups whole milk

1/2 cup chilled whipping cream

6 ounces  semisweet chocolate chips

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Topping

1 cup chilled whipping cream

2 tablespoons powdered sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

To prepare crust:

Spray 9-inch-diameter glass pie dish with nonstick spray. Stir butter and chocolate in heavy

small saucepan over low heat until melted. Finely grind cookies in processor. Add chocolate-

butter mixture. Process until crumbs are moistened. Press crumb mixture into prepared pie

dish. Freeze until firm, about 30 minutes.

To prepare filling:

Whisk first 4 ingredients in heavy medium saucepan to blend. Whisk in egg yolks to form thick

paste. Gradually whisk in milk, then cream. Whisk over medium-high heat until mixture

thickens and boils 1 minute. Remove from heat. Add chocolate and whisk until smooth. Whisk

vanilla. Cool 5 minutes, whisking occasionally. Transfer filling to frozen crust. Chill

until cold, at least 2 hours and up to 1 day.

To prepare topping:

Beat first 3 ingredients in large bowl until firm peaks form. Spoon whipped cream into pastry

bag fitted with large star tip. Pipe whatever you want, or just spread on top.

(Can be made 4 hours ahead; chill.)

I typically stand firm on the stance of less is more.  I have 1 dog.  I have 1 husband.  I have 1 car.  I have 1 job.  I have 1 wardrobe.  I have 1 computer.  I have 2 keys on my key chain.   I have 2 sets of sheets.  I have 2 favorite TV shows.  It’s pretty simple.  I like it.

When it comes to a baked good.  Bring. It. On.  More is More.  I can get behind that. You can get behind that.

Pumpkin.  great!

Banana.  oh my!

Oatmeal.  huh? don’t stop!

Chocolate Chip.  really? i was kind of kidding.

Bread.  are you done now?

Yes.

You can play around with this recipe.  Get crazy.

This is your whole wheat and all purpose flours, baking powder and soda, salt and cinnamon with the oats at stage left.  Thanks, Bob.

Notice.  No sugar here.  That may or may not come in later. (ie. I forgot to add sugar)

Here’s some sugar, that’ll work.  Ripe bananas are so sweet, I wanted to explore that.  Sure, that’s it.

I’m not tired of pumpkin yet.  Are you?  I’m totally not.

Banana and pumpkin and egg and vanilla and melted coconut oil and almond milk.

Mix it up.  Mix it up. I love this.  Oh, and this is where I was going to add a tablespoon or two of honey.  But I forgot.  Did I mention that yet?  I forgot to add sugar.

Ok, let’s do this.

The batter was a bit on the dry side at this point.  There are lots of ways to deal with this.  I was lucky enough to have more ripe banana available so I added another ripe smashed banana.  You could also add more milk or water to thin it out a bit more.  And now let’s appreciate those chips…..good, moving on.

Dump it.  Smooth it.  Bake it.

Cool it.  Smell it.  Wait.  Smell it again.

Cut it. Eat it.  Eat more.  share it i guess.

PS.  It was really good without any added sugar.  The chocolate chips add just the right amount of sweetness.

Pumpkin Banana Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Bread

adapted from running to the kitchen

1 cup whole wheat flour

1/2 cup all purpose flour

1 cup old fashioned oats

1/2 teaspoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

3 small to medium ripe bananas

1/2 cup pumpkin puree

1 egg

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 tablespoons honey

2 teaspoons coconut oil, melted

1/4 cup almond milk

1/3 chocolate chips

Preheat oven of 350 degrees F.  Grease a loaf pan and set aside.  Mix dry ingredients together (flour through cinnamon- 7 ingredients) in a large bowl.  Mash bananas in small bowl.  To the mashed bananas, add the pumpkin, egg, vanilla, honey, oil and milk.  Add the wet ingredients to the dry ingredients and mix to combine.  Fold in the chocolate chips.   Pour batter into the prepared loaf pan.  Bake for 45-50 minutes until toothpick comes out clean.  Let cool for 10 minutes in pan before transferring to a cooking rack.

I’m going to change my major.  I never did in college, so now’s my big chance.  I’m going to major in Vacation.

Yes, waiter, I would like another pina colada.

It’s going to be 85 degrees again?

Sure, I’ll take a wedge of that stinky cheese with this fancy wine.

Can you please pass the butter again for my third roll before my dinner is served?

Of course I’ll dance the macarena at midnight… right after I eat second dessert.

Lovely.  Yes, set up my umbrella and beach chair right here.

Oh, room service called?  My eggs and bacon and toast and juice and coffee will be here in 10?  Perfect, wake me up in 9.

If I could major in Vacation, I would study all night, I’d even go to those office hours, Ace the tests,  and no doubt graduate with honors.  If I could find the right program, I’d pursue a graduate degree and move into a teaching position where I could just focus on my research. Vacation research.  I’ve found my passion.

And then there is reality.  Turkey Pot Pie is reality.  Trying to recover from Vacation is reality.  This involves vegetables and whole wheat.

But you get to make a crust!  And that crust has Pumpkin (and fake butter) in it!  I’m trying to be really excited about this!!  Can you tell!!?

Mix up those dry ingredients.  That suspicious looking pile of green is sage, promise.
Thump, thump.  Add that Earth Balance Natural Buttery Spread with Olive Oil like you love it.

Smoosh it around with that thing.

Sigh.  Add health to it and smoosh it around some more.

Ball it up.

And let it rest in the fridge.  Just like I rested on my beach chair with my pina colada gazing out onto the blue gentle lapping waves.  Yeah…

Chop, chop chop.

Now’s it’s getting serious.

Cook these guys.

Til’ juuust abooouuut NOW.

Then add the rest of the health.

Sauce time!  Stir this up and add some milk til it’s thickened.

See?  It’s thickened.  Add the turkey and tarragon, salt, pepper, and poultry seasoning.

Dump that in that.

Wake up, dough!  It’s time to get flat.

From this angle, dough, you look like a tan island.  A tropical tan island.  With beaches and waves.   Vacation.

Sneaky trick.  Roll the dough up with your rolling pin to transfer it to the filling.

Trim off the excess and make steam vents.

Bake it.

Eat it.  It’s like a vacation from your vacation.

Turkey Pot Pie with Pumpkin Crust

adapted from Clean Eating Magazine Nov/Dec 2011

Crust:

1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour, plus additional for work surface and dusting

2 tsp dried sage

1 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

2 tbsp olive oil buttery spread

1 1/2 cups fresh or jarred pumpkin puree (not pumpkin pie filling)

Filling:

1 tsp olive oil

1 white onion, chopped

1 large sweet potato, peeled and chopped into 1/2 inch cubes

2 stalks celery, sliced into 1/2 inch crescents

1 1/2 cups cut and stemmed green beans (1 inch long pieces)

1 cup fresh or frozen corn kernels (thawed, if frozen)

2 tbsp whole wheat flour

1 cup almond milk

1 tsp dried tarragon

2 tsp poultry seasoning

salt to taste

pepper to taste

1 1/2 lb cooked boneless, skinless turkey breast, chopped

Cooking spray

Instructions:

1. Prepare crust.  In large bowl, add 1 1/2 cups flour, sage, baking powder and salt; stir with a fork to combine.  Stir in buttery spread, mashing until mixture is crumbly.  Add pumpkin puree and stir until flour is blended and mixture is clumpy.  In bowl, use your hands to knead dough 5-8 times, just until dough comes together and is soft and slightly sticky, about 1 minute.  (Do not overwork dough.  If dough sticks to bowl, add a bit more flour.) Place a layer of plastic wrap directly over top of dough and refrigerate until needed, 30 minutes or up to 1 day.

2. Prepare filling.  In a large saucepan or Dutch oven, heat oil on medium-high.  Add onion and saute, stirring occasionally, until softened, about 5 minutes.  Add sweet potatoes, celery, beans and corn; cook, stirring frequently, for 10 minutes or until slightly tender.  Sprinkle 2 tbsp flour over top of vegetables, stirring to coat.  Stir in milk, bring to a simmer and reduce heat to medium-low.  Cook until milk thickens into a sauce and coats vegetables, 5-8 minutes.  Stir in tarragon, poultry seasoning, salt, pepper and turkey and remove from heat.

3. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.  Coat 9 x 13 inch baking dish with cooking spray.  Spoon filling into dish in an even layer.

4. Transfer dough to a lightly floured work surface.  Using a rolling pin dusted with flour, roll dough out to a 1/4 inch thick, 9 x 13 inch rectangle..  Set rolling pin at bottom edge of dough and gently roll dough onto pin over baking dish and gently unroll dough over filling.  Using a paring knife or kitchen scissors, trim excess overlapping dough from rim.  If desired, crimp edges with the tines of a fork or your fingers if you are an overachiever.  Cut slits into the crust to create steam vents.  Transfer to oven and bake for 25 to 30 minutes, until filling bubbles and crust is lightly browned.  Let cool for 5 minutes before serving.

Yeah, that’s scary.  That’s what my life felt like last week.  Does your life feel like this sometimes?  Disorganized.  Messy.  Upside down.  Uneven.

 The great thing is that even with all of that scariness, we get this lovely whipped-ness, and then…

This.  Cake.  We Get CAAAKE!!  No matter what. We still get cake.

Now for the topping.  Melt it.

Sift it.

Mix it. (with almond milk & vanilla)

Spread it.  And align chocolate chips into scary phrases.  Serve to your husband’s Halloween work party.  (While saying a prayer for gratefulness for our messy, sweet life.)

Pumpkin Cake with Brown Butter Icing

Adapted from Shutterbean via Martha Stewart

For the cake:

• 8 tablespoons (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature, plus more for pan
• 1 2/3 cups all-purpose flour, plus more for pan
• 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 1/4 teaspoon ground allspice
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 1/2 cups sugar
• 2 large eggs
• 1 cup pumpkin puree
• 1/2 cup warm (110 degrees) milk
• Chocolate chips for decorating.

1. Heat the oven to 350 degrees. Spray a 9-by-2-inch round cake pan with cooking spray. Line pan with parchment, and spray the parchment with cooking spray.
2. In a large bowl, sift together flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, salt, baking powder, and baking soda; set aside.
3. In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat sugar and butter together until light and fluffy, about 2 minutes. Add eggs, and beat until combined. Add pumpkin puree and milk; beat until combined. Add reserved flour mixture; beat on low speed until just combined.
4. Pour batter into prepared pan, and bake until a cake tester inserted into the middle comes out clean, about 55 minutes. Transfer the cake to a wire rack to cool. Let cake rest 20 minutes.
5. Unmold cake. Using an offset spatula, spread icing over top of cake.  Decorate with chocolate chips.

For the Icing:

That’s no longer a tortilla chip, it’s nachos.

My bread just turned into pizza!

This hunk of broccoli that I dipped in fondue is now cheesy broccoli.

Noodles?  Nope, it’s mac ‘n cheese.

Do I need to go on? You’re with me, right?  Thought so…

Anyway, you put that cheese in a mixer with flour, butter, and rice krispies and a dash or two of red pepper, and you have another party!

Careful, that cheddar is SHARP!  (And so is that screw at the bottom of the mixer)

The special thing about these wafers is that they tend toward being a southern thing/tradition.  So, if you’re feeling, oh…I don’t know…Dukes of Hazzard-ish? give it a go.  In fact, I bet Bo Duke is munching on one right now.  (Was he your favorite?  He was my favorite.)

It is no mistake that these are of an orange complexion.  It is Halloween, almost, isn’t it?  Be bold and take cheese wafers to the office Halloween party.  Or dress up as Bo Duke and…well, be Hazardous.

Or if you are going to a fancy lady party, throw some thyme, sage, or chives in there and sip on some fancy lady tea while you nibble on your fancy lady wafer.

It’s a sticky dough, so it’s needs to chill for a bit.

I bet you a band aid that you can do a better job at wrapping up your dough than I did.

After they are chilled, they are a bit jagged looking when you slice them, but not to worry…

Because they get all baked and round-ish and yummy and flaky and buttery and a little crunchy with a hint of spice and cheesy and really really GOOD.  And you keep shoving them in your face.

Cheese Wafers

from Mrs. James G. Horton

Advent Moravian Church Cookbook – Winston-Salem, North Carolina

1 cup rice krispies

1 cup flour

1 1/4 sticks butter

1 cup sharp cheddar cheese

Dash red pepper

Cream butter and cheese.  Add rice krispies and work with beater.  Add pepper, work in flour. Shape into rolls about 1 inch in diameter.  Wrap in wax paper.  Place in refrigerator until firm. Slice and bake about 15 minutes in 350 degree oven.  This recipe you can roll, freeze, slice, and bake as convenient.

“You left it at the grocery store.”  He stated kindly.  ”Just ask for Bob, he has it there in the office.”  Sigh.  ”Thanks, George…and nice to meet you.”  And I will totally NOT be switching to Geico now.

What George failed to tell me was not that I just lost my wallet.  No.  I left my entire purse in the shopping cart outside in the shopping cart corral.  And some nice human being took it inside to the store manager for safe keeping.  Kind people do exist.

And so does this cake.  This is my favorite part of making a cake.  Whipping the butter and the sugar together until its fluffy.  Then taking a big whiff of it.  Is that weird?

More apples!!  And you can tell your mom there’s vegetables in this cake.

I stuck fork holes in that potato and used le microwave to bake it until it was soft all the way through.  Peel it, smooch it, mix it in.

The sweet potato leaves little flecks of orange throughout.  It’s lovely.  Like when you discover that no one has stolen your stuff that they totally could have stolen.

Oh, yeah.  Do this part too.  And easy on the nutmeg, I get carried away with the little nutmeg nut on the microplane.  Scrape, scrape, scrape, scrape, enough.

Add a smidge at a time and mix it.  Add a smidge more and mix it.  Add the rest, mix it.

Getting closer!  Getting closer!  Almost there!

It already smells like a hug (Like the hug I gave Bob at the grocery store.) and you haven’t even baked it yet.

Well, if that was a hug, I’m not even sure what this is.  But what I do know is that I am incredibly grateful to the kind people in this world who do all the nice things that they do everyday.  A BIG thank you to the nice man or woman who made my life a lot easier yesterday.  Have some cake!

Sweet Potato Apple Cake

from 1000 Vegetarian Recipes by  Carol Gelles

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1/2 cup whole wheat flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1 1/2 ground cinnamon

1 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter or margarine

1/2 cup firmly packed light brown sugar or dark brown sugar

1/3 cup sugar

2 eggs

1 cup mashed baked sweet potatoes

1 cup buttermilk

2 cups chopped, peeled apple

Cinnamon-Sugar (1 Tablespoon sugar to 1 teaspoon cinnamon) for topping.

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.  Grease and flour a 9-inch-square baking pan.  ( I totally used just whatever was easier to get to in the cabinet, so I used a 10 inch loaf pan.  I’d recommend to use a more shallow dish since this is a cake, not a bread.)

2.  In a large bowl or on a piece of waxed paper, stir together both flours, the baking powder, cinnamon, baking soda, salt, and nutmeg.

3.  In a large bowl, cream the butter; add both sugars and beat until fluffy.  Beat in the eggs, one at a time.  Beat in the sweet potatoes, then the buttermilk.

4.  Stir in the dry ingredients until combined.  Stir in the chopped apples.

5.  Spread into the prepared baking pan.  Sprinkle tap generously with Cinnamon-Sugar.  Bake 1 hour or until a wooden pick inserted in the center comes out clean and cake has pulled away from the edges of the pan.  Cut into pieces.